It makes me sad how true that title is but its okay cause I am an amazing mess and anyone who gets to witness this is lucky. So far this year a lot has happened like its only because I have discovered that gin is my drink but with lemonade not tonic.
I am honestly looking forward to this year so much. I have New York at the start of February which is gonna be amazing but I think we need to pray for Martha because she is stuck on the plane with me, love that for her. This year I also have my 18th birthday and everyone else's birthday, although I might be broke from buying new dresses for them. Bigger news I'm starting cheerleading tomorrow with Abby and I'm so excited cause anyone who actually knows me knows how much I love my dancing which leads on to the Lowery performance as it will be coming up but I'm not actually sure when but its some time this year also we have this years show which is all circus based, so for street we are doing Britney spears' song circus and me and Abby want to do a song from IT for ballet, It's going to be so good.
Wow that was a lot in one paragraph.
It's literally 6 days into this year and I already have two new pinafore, I'm obsessed with my new alien perfume, I have a new charm and I'm behind on work. My problem is that I can't work when I'm just at home all day, like ino as soon as I get back to college I will be fine and I will get all my work done I just can't when I'm off.
More worrying news is that my mum seriously thinks I have anaemia because I'm always cold, being deadly serious I sleep with two quilts and two blankets and I'm still cold, like my feet and hands are always freezing and I'm always shaking from like being cold. honestly I live in hoodies and fluffy socks cause I can't function. So yano I googled symptoms and a few options came up including anaemia, hypothyroidism and some others, so I have dry skin, I'm always exhausted but can never sleep, I'm pale but maybe I'm just pale for life, I cant concentrate, I'm dizzy a lot, I have numb feet and hands most of the time, I have the worst memory ever it's almost like I zone out in situations but don't remember zoning out, its weird and there's some other things. So it is a possibility there may actually be something wrong with me.
I think that might be it for me to update you all on, so I hope you liked this mess of a post but yano its a mess like me so it is all good. I hope you are all having an amazing start of the year.
I'm a Taurus cause my birthday is the 10th of May, so lets see what I'm supposed to be like. The traits are in like bold and then my wordy bits are underneath.
1. On the outside I am apparently supposed to look very calm and quiet but on the inside I am very intense.
Eleanor said I'm not intense but I'm not what you would expect from the outside (she's calling me crazy).
2. I have a hard time trusting and believing peoples emotions
Hellllll Yessss this is so true I fake trust people so much literally there's like 5 people that I actually trust, I'm just fake with the rest of you. Sorry for your loss.
3. I care too much about people
I don't think I do, it takes me a while I think and I have been told I'm very reserved. If your not happy with that please move on cause I don't like to waste my time.
4. I don't let people go completely
Noooo I can, if I really want to because I don't like you or I would be better without you its easy. If you don't believe me I could give you a list.
5. My hugs are the best when someone is having a bad day
Hug me and let me know
6. My spirit colour is pink
7. If you look into my eyes you will immediately trust me with your life
I'm not too sure someone try it and let me know.
8. I love sleeping and cuddling
I'm sorry but who doesn't, feel free to hug me.
9. I'm loyal babe
10. I'm good at finding things out and putting them together
Erm well I would hope there isn't anything being hidden from me, but if there is im sure I will find out what it is.
11. If you break my trust I will never forgive you
This is so me, I don't trust a lot of people at all and if I do and they mess me over I wont be counting on you any time soon maybe even ever.
12. I'm great at distancing myself from people
Yep I'm good at this, I need very few people in my life to be happy so be careful or you might be out of it.
13. I'm stubborn
Maybe, maybe not
14. I don't get mad or argue I just stop caring as much
Hate arguing and will avoid it at all costs, but the more that happens I just distance myself abit more every time.
15. I speak two languages - sarcasm and realness
I know someone who will heavily agree with this, well at least about the sarcasm.
16. I isolate myself when things get too much
Yep I'm guilty of this as well. But I actually don't mind because you get to know who cares really quickly and you just distance yourself from everyone else.
So this was an experience, which you should actually try cause its fun finding out what you are apparently supposed to be like and how you actually are. Taurus' are the best and I think I am most like one so I'm okay with that.
P.S hope you had a lovely new years and best wishes for 2019
So there's aren't exactly theories anymore but I don't know what to call it so we are sticking with theories.
I'm sorry I missed last Sunday I was ill and just couldn't focus on anything but I'm back and I'm all good, Also hoped you enjoyed part two.
Omhl I'm such an awkward person like I don't even know how to finish my own blog, what even if life. Aaaahhhhh, yano what bye hope you had a lovely Christmas.
I am very aware I have just done an update but I'm bored sat at home and I haven't got anything else to wright about. Literally I had an appointment this morning so didn't go in for RE but then I would have form for 15 minutes then have to come straight home to get ready for tonight (will explain later) so I just haven't gone in after my appointment but now I'm bored and I still have 3 hours. I've done work, watched an episode, cleaned and fixed my brothers jacket cause he made a hole in it, but I'm running out of things to do.
So Tonight with dancing we have a cute Christmas party, we are literally like a really big family its so cute. But ye I have to go at 5:30 to rehearse cause we perform dances and then get changed and have a nice night, like when I'm there I will be so busy but I have 3 hours now and I would just go earlier but I literally cant, that's the earliest I can go also to make it worse everyone is in lesson now so I have no one to talk to.
One thing I'm really looking forward to tonight for is that I get to see Chloe, she's literally on a train back from Scotland right now and she's coming tonight, I'm literally so happy I haven't seen her in ages.
Also if you haven't watched Clique you should, I have been obsessed and I have recently got Eleanor into it, it's amazing but so confusing. The show is on BBC and season 2 just finished, would highly recommend. Song recommendations that have kept me going today are...
Friends by Eliza and the bear
Call me over by Dusky Grey
Paradise Motion by Charlotte Cardin
Retrospect by Visitas
Ultraviolet by Stiff Dylan's mainly because I watch Angus, thongs and perfect snogging like two days ago
Nearly forgot but this week has been stressful, Ariana's pre sale was Wednesday but she hasn't released Manchester dates yet which is fine I'm just wishing I get pre sale for them but the concert wouldn't be till next September possibly which is ages away like people will be in uni, like that's so weird.
Something to look forward to this weekend is that me and Eleanor are having a sleepover although I think she's more excited to meet Oscar, its okay though. I'm not sure what we are doing yet we can either stay in and watch films or we can go to this party my mums going to, I guess its how sociable we are feeling.
So ye I think that's it, I now have just over 2 hours to waste, I might just watch a film and heat up I'm literally so cold. Hope you didn't mind this random post but it kept me busy for 30 minutes.
I didn't know what to post so I decided to do a mini update from mock week and just somethings going on. So first of all I don't have any mocks because I only do art subjects as I dropped psychology because there's stuff going on that a few people have picked up on and messaged me about and asked me to talk about it but I'm not going to as I'm not exactly comfortable and its just complicated.
Monday I didn't go into college and went shopping with my grandma as I haven't asked for anything for Christmas and everyone in the family is asking me and its stressing me out, as I don't exactly want anything so to kinda just make them happy or at least to not ask me so much I went shopping with my grandma to look at stuff. This was a fail because I didn't find a dress for Thursday or Saturday which I kinda of need so love that for me but also if we walked past anything I was asked a bunch of questions of if I want it or anything like that, honestly hate it so much and Trafford was soooooo busy which didn't help.
Tuesday was possibly the best day because I had an appointment n the morning where I was told the best thing ever even though other people weren't happy about it I was, literally still so happy about t now. Anyway after that me and Eleanor went shopping so I could actually find a dress and heels, as well as things for Shanice's present, this was semi successful like I didn't buy a dress but we narrowed it down to two and it was just a fun day, I actually don't know what I would do without her sometimes. I also re dyed my hair today as it was needed, well it was actually needed a few months ago.
Wednesday I stayed at college all day to get some textiles and photography done as our deadlines are in like 2-4 weeks (I actually don't know cause every teacher says something different).
Thursday I stayed home and helped my mum paint the kitchen so it can be all tidied, I also sent off my application for art foundation but nothing else really happened but I did go to dancing at 3:30 to go help with the younger classes.
Friday (just a little bit stressful)I had to be for photography at 9 but I was late but its not really a big deal so I saw my teacher then went down to textiles so miss could see my work and then technically I could of left but I stayed cause I was supposed to be going on a DATE, wtf ino what is life. Anyway me being the amazing person I am stayed until 3 literally just doing textiles but I did go see jenny before her music exam. Here's the problem, I a stessy person like really bad its actually quite bad how funny, but I spent the times with jenny before her exam and whilst she was in her exam stressing because I had my friends performance to go and see and I didn't know when his exam finished so I freaked myself out and left with jenny because I didn't want to miss Emily's performance cause I would have literally hated myself. So I texted him saying I was going home cause I needed to get back and then I spent the whole bus journey justifying it I guess in my head, cause I didn't want to be there stressing about getting back cause that's just unfair and would have just ruined it, so ye we did that then I semi complained to jenny's mum about it cause I was that stressed (this is why don't do these things its my talent I guess to ruin things love that for me actually though idk what state its in). Then it was really awkward and whilst jenny was eating downstairs I rang Eleanor and stressed about it, she kept me sane and completely agreed with me so it was alright I felt better. So we watched my friends performance, she was amazing a usual and then I went home and there was a Christmas tree (side note, all week I have been wanting one and that day I said if there isn't a Christmas tree when I get home I might cry after everything else but there was so we were all good).
little Christmas tree appreciation ...
So welcome to my messy life, I will update on the situation if anything changes but I messed up so I don't think it will other than that I will post again two days before Christmas.